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So my boyfriend Marcus made me realize I'm going to marry this man last week when we were at Walmart buying groceries for my mom's birthday dinner. We'd been debating between getting salmon or chicken, laughing about my mom's impossible-to-please palate, when we decided to grab some breakfast items too. We're walking down the cereal aisle, Marcus pushing our cart while I checked my phone for mom's grocery list, when I see this elderly man in a wheelchair struggling to reach something on the top shelf.
The store was absolutely packed with the usual weekend crowd, people walking by pretending not to notice this man's obvious struggle. Kids were running around, couples were arguing about brand preferences, and everyone seemed completely absorbed in their own little worlds. This one young employee even walked past rolling her eyes like helping customers wasn't literally her job description. I felt that familiar pang of secondhand embarrassment and frustration watching people's complete lack of awareness.
Marcus immediately walks over without saying a single word to me, abandoning our cart mid-aisle. I watched him approach with that easy, confident stride he has. "What were you trying to get, sir?" he asks, his voice warm and genuinely interested. The elderly man points with a slightly shaky hand to a box of oatmeal positioned way up high on the top shelf, completely out of reach for someone seated. Marcus grabs it without hesitation, hands it over with this genuine smile that reaches his eyes, and the man starts tearing up saying "Thank you son, my wife's been asking for this specific brand all week. I've been to three stores looking for it."
But here's the thing that got me - Marcus then asks "Is there anything else you need while I'm here? I'm tall enough to reach pretty much anything." And he proceeds to help this man get five more items from various high shelves throughout that section. The whole time he's crouched down talking to him at eye level, asking about his wife, genuinely laughing at his stories about their fifty-two year marriage and her very particular breakfast preferences. I stood there watching this man I'm falling in love with treat a complete stranger with more kindness than some people show their own family.
When we're walking away, I'm about to praise him for being such an incredible human being, and he goes "My grandpa was in a wheelchair for three years before he passed. People used to ignore him like he was invisible, like his disability somehow made him less worthy of basic human decency. I promised myself I'd never be that person who just walks by."
Two days later we're back at the same Walmart because I realized I'd forgotten to buy candles for mom's cake, and the elderly man sees us from across the store. He wheels himself over with the biggest smile I've ever seen and tells Marcus "My wife loved that oatmeal so much, she made me promise to find you and say thank you again. She wants to know if you have a grandmother she can set up with her single brother." We all laughed, but I could see how much this simple interaction meant to both of them.
This man has shown me green flags constantly for our entire six months together. When I got food poisoning at 2 AM, he drove over in his pajamas with crackers and ginger ale, staying the whole night. When my car broke down during rush hour, he left work early and helped me deal with the tow truck driver without complaining about the overtime pay he lost. When my toxic ex started texting me trying to "reconnect," instead of getting jealous, Marcus just said "I trust you to handle whatever feels right" and actually meant it.
Last month when my anxiety got really bad and I needed space to sort through some family drama, he gave it to me without making me feel guilty. No passive-aggressive comments, no making it about him. Just "text me when you're ready, I'll be here" with complete sincerity.
We've been together six months now and he still opens doors, still asks how my day was and actually listens to my rambling answers, still remembers small things I mention in passing conversations.