Have you ever watched someone realize they were the toxic friend all along? year's party.

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My best friend Tyler thought he was the ultimate wingman. Every time we went out, he'd approach girls and say, "My buddy over there thinks you're gorgeous, but he's too shy to come over." Then he'd bring them to our table, introduce me, and within minutes, somehow end up with their number instead.

"Dude, she was totally into me," he'd explain later. "You'll find someone who's actually right for you." This happened so consistently that I started wondering if something was wrong with me.

Tyler would borrow money constantly. "Just until payday, bro." Twenty here, fifty there, sometimes hundreds. He'd pay me back eventually, but always late, and always less than he borrowed. "I thought it was forty, not sixty," he'd say, acting confused.

He had this way of one-upping every story. If I got a promotion, Tyler had just been offered a better position. If I went on a good date, Tyler had just met someone "incredible." If I bought something nice, Tyler would mention he was getting the upgraded version.

The worst part was how he'd sabotage my relationships. He'd text my girlfriends "as a friend," asking if I was treating them well. "Tyler's a great guy, but he can be... intense sometimes," he'd tell them. He'd plant seeds of doubt, then position himself as the supportive friend.

When my girlfriend Jessica broke up with me, Tyler was right there with comfort. "She didn't deserve you anyway, man." Two weeks later, I saw them together at a coffee shop. "It just happened," Tyler explained. "We were both hurting."

Last month, Tyler started dating my coworker, Amanda. I'd mentioned I thought she was interesting. "You should ask her out," Tyler encouraged. So I did. She politely declined, saying she was focusing on work.

The next week, Tyler casually mentioned he'd started seeing someone from my office. "Her name's Amanda." When I told him I'd literally just asked her out, he acted shocked. "Oh man, that's so awkward! I had no idea."

Tyler started bringing Amanda to our hangouts. She'd mention work details I'd never told her, things Tyler must have shared. "Tyler talks about you all the time," she'd say. "He's such a good friend." But it felt... pitying.

One night, I was at Tyler's apartment when Amanda called. He put her on speaker while in the bathroom. "Hey babe, I'm almost ready. Marcus is here."

"Oh god, really?" Amanda's voice came through clearly. "I thought you were coming alone."

"Yeah, change of plans. He's been kind of clingy lately since the Jessica thing."

"That's so sad. Tyler, you're such a good friend for putting up with him."

"Someone has to," Tyler called out. "The guy has zero game. Did I tell you he actually thought he had a chance with you?"

They both laughed.

"That's actually pathetic," Amanda said. "No wonder he can't keep a girlfriend."

"Right? I probably did her a favor, honestly."

I quietly left the apartment.

That's when everything clicked. Tyler wasn't my wingman – he was my saboteur. Every failed relationship, every missed opportunity, every moment of self-doubt. He'd been systematically destroying my confidence while positioning himself as the hero.

I realized Tyler had been doing this for years. In college, he'd tell girls I was "going through a rough patch" or "not really ready for anything serious." He'd share my insecurities disguised as concern. "Marcus is really self-conscious about his height," he'd mention casually.

I confronted him at our usual bar. "I heard your conversation with Amanda."

Tyler's face went white. "Dude, that wasn't... we were just joking around."

"For how long, Tyler? How long have you been sabotaging me?"

"Look, man, I never meant for it to go this far."

"What happened? You systematically destroying my self-esteem while stealing my girlfriends?"

"You're being dramatic. I was trying to help you see that those girls weren't right for you."

"By dating them yourself?"

I cut him off completely. Blocked his number, told our mutual friends exactly what he'd been doing.

Amanda broke up with Tyler three weeks later. She found out he'd been telling people at work that she was "just a rebound" and "not that smart." She called me to apologize.

Last week, I ran into Jessica. She mentioned Tyler had reached out recently, claiming I'd been asking about her. When she said she wasn't interested, he started saying I'd "changed" and become bitter.

Even after I'd cut him off, Tyler was still trying to control my narrative.

Some people don't steal your girlfriends because they want them. They steal them because they want to prove they can.